Your child’s brain continues to mature into their early 20s. This sends the message that you value your child’s input, which can be good for your child’s self-esteem. You can also include your child in family decision-making – for example, decisions about what to do in the next school holidays, or whether to buy a family pet. If you can make those decisions with your child, rather than for your child, your child is more likely to stick with whatever you’ve decided together. It’s particularly good to use these steps for big decisions that affect your child, like decisions about school, further study, staying out late and so on. Give your child feedback on how they handle the process.For example, your child might be able to make a late change to their electives. Brainstorm what to do if things don’t go according to plan.For example, is it better to relax by studying music or build skills for further study in coding? Weigh up the pros and cons to make the best decision.For example, your child finds music and art relaxing but is interested in studying IT at university. Talk about the pros and cons of different options.For example, your child might need to decide on their electives for Year 8 – Italian, art, music, coding and so on. You can help your child develop and practise this skill by working through some basic steps together when they have decisions to make: Independent decision-making is an important life skill. Help pre-teens and teenagers develop independent decision-making skills You might need to negotiate rules and boundaries as your child gets older. It’s a good idea to monitor how well your child is going with independence and adjust the rules accordingly. Likewise, rules can help you be consistent in the way you treat your child if they push the boundaries of their independence. Rules help to keep your child safe as they try new things. Set clear and fair family rulesĬlear family rules about behaviour, communication and socialising will help your child understand where the limits are and what you expect. It also models positive ways of relating to others. Talking about your own opinions and feelings calmly can help to keep the lines of communication open between you and your child and strengthen your relationship.
And different opinions can be a good chance for you to talk about how it’s OK for people to have different perspectives. Your child’s opinions might be different from yours, but taking them seriously sends the message that you value your child. This is an important part of becoming independent.Įxploring opinions and ideas is one of the ways your child works out where they fit in the world. If you tune in to your child’s emotions, you can help your child learn to understand and manage these emotions by themselves. Respect pre-teen and teenage emotions and opinionsĪs pre-teens and teenagers go through the physical, social and emotional changes of adolescence, they often experience intense and sometimes overwhelming emotions. making time to listen when your child needs to talk.taking a genuine interest in your child’s interests, hobbies and friends.It also makes it easier for them to bounce back from mistakes or challenges. When teenagers feel safe and secure, they have more confidence to try new things, and discover who they are and what they want to do with their lives. Supportive, strong relationships help teenagers feel safe and secure. Show pre-teens and teenagers love and support
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